Change
by Sue Shay
Summary: The CBI Serious Crimes Unit is breaking up, and Jane has to find a way to be all right with it. COMPLETE!


Jane woke to the sound of a strangled cough followed by stifled retching. The screaming squeak that marked the ladies' room door opening tore through the early morning air. Before the corresponding lower pitched noise of the door closing, a series of choking gags slipped through the opening and out into the hall.

_Sounds like someone had a rough night. Partying on a school night is never a good idea._

He lifted his book from his chest, the place he set it before slipping into a nap early that morning. _Rise and Fall of Stalin's Regime,_ by Angs T. Henchmun. Dry reading, except for the exciting bits about genius use of propaganda. Glancing at the page number, he closed it and set it next to the stack on the table.

The leather of the sofa crackled as he sat up. He hadn't intended to fall asleep, but lately these things happened more and more frequently. It was bound to. He was healing after all, especially since he'd stopped fighting it. With healing came peace. With peace came happiness. With happiness came improved health. Full circle.

Not that he was completely happy. Nor did he feel at full health. But he was sleeping better. Just a little. Maybe not _full_ circle. More like a continuing arc of a broken line.

Rubbing his eyes, he yawned before allowing his head to drop back. Improved health. More sleep. Better attitude.

_Appetite._

Who was he kidding? He'd never lost his appetite. It was one of the few things he kept because it directly related to his hunt for Red John. Without energy, there could be no chase. Time used for sleep could be better spent reading files. Exercise was a waste also because his internal turmoil kept his muscles tensed and toned. Recreation time was traded for information processing. It made sense to keep feeding his body to do the rest of these things.

But now Red John was gone and there was serious danger of disintegration. He imagined it as a space capsule reentering the atmosphere. Without a heat shield, he'd burn up as gravity pulled him back to Earth.

Jane glanced at the empty desks in the CBI bullpen. They all would. Spending ten years struggling against the greatest evil since Jack the Ripper primed a lifestyle even the most balanced cop would have trouble maintaining. When it ended so abruptly with Cho's shot to Red John's head, the entire team closed ranks, doing their best to support one another because each of them was alone.

Well… except for Lisbon. She made the first step towards good mental health by establishing a new relationship almost immediately. It seemed mostly casual, although she evidently cared for the man. Jane hardly recognized her after that. A whole new woman. And it seemed to be going slow and controlled. Typical cop; don't rush into anything. At least that's what the junior agent of the unit implied.

The bathroom door screeched its alarm followed by fast light tap-tap stride of a small, determined woman.

_Lisbon. I'd recognize that high-energy stomp anywhere._

He shook his head and stuffed his hands into his pockets. Seriously? Drinking on a week night? That didn't sound like her at all.

Movement caught his eye; the pocket-rocket herself was dashing down the hall with the fortitude of a superhero. Her gaze shifted to him and she made a double-take, almost walking into a mezzanine support post. Her lips moved in apology to the post and her gaze dropped to the ground, continuing towards her office.

_Guilt? She's up to something._

Patience was in order. Let her get into her office and allow her to stew in dread about his arrival. In a teasing way, of course. Based on that look, she knew he'd heard her vomiting and would ferret an explanation out of her.

"Morning, Jane."

He turned to Cho who entered the near side of the bullpen.

"Good morning, Cho. Took the stairs again, I see."

"Yeah, no elevator ding."

Jane grinned. Cho was getting good. He'd be leaving them soon, either to head his own CBI unit or teach kinesics at the bureau academy. At least, he would as soon as Cho realized it could happen. Just a little more healing. He was almost ready to move on.

Grace Van Pelt arrived next, coming through the door on autopilot. Beautiful though Van Pelt was, her supplemental education night classes were taking their toll. Light bags and darkening rings under her eyes made him want to hand her a cucumber facial treatment. He tried very hard to coach her in mnemotechnics techniques; it would help with all those tedious laws and regs she struggled with. Bright woman, great cop. She was learning fast, but she had such an issue with rote memorization.

But he had faith. She was a rising star if she could keep her natural compassion in control. One day she'd figure out that her strong suit wasn't as much upholding the law as it was upholding people.

"Good morning, Grace. How goes the Family Law/Domestic Relations class?"

"Friends increase niceness eventually." She flashed a half-smile as she set her coffee on her work station and her bag on the floor.

"Just 'fine'?" he grinned.

She rewarded him with a grin in return and nodded. "It's better. I'm trying to use that system you taught me but it doesn't feel natural yet."

The elevator dinged and Jane glanced towards it.

"Eventually it will. Keep after it."

"There's just so much to learn…"

"But worth learning, Grace. It will be good for your career. Trust me."

With a shrug, she settled into her chair and logged onto her computer.

A tall man entered, glancing around, but Jane could tell he wasn't seeing anything. His long face looked even longer than usual, his lantern jaw was slack. Definite lack of sleep.

"Rigsby… rough night?"

"Ben's learning to walk," the lantern-jawed agent grumbled. "Last night he smacked his head on the sofa table. Ended up at the ER."

"Oh, no…" Grace murmured. "Is he okay?"

"Fine, fine. Cried a lot. I had to call Sarah to come get him. Having his papa hugging him wasn't the same as Mama. We spent most of night waiting to either have a test done or waiting for results of another."

Jane leaned forward and patted Rigsby on the arm with a firmness to both wake him and reassure him.

"Get used to it, Wayne. Children have a way of causing parents to lose sleep at the most inconvenient time. I can recall once Angela and I were up 48 hours straight tending to Charlotte during a bout with recurring croup, right before I was booked for a show at the Cardian Palace in New Jersey. But children need their parents. What can you do, right?"

Van Pelt looked significantly toward Cho and then at Rigsby who had the blank stare of someone who couldn't believe his ears.

_I still got it – the ability to surprise these people._

"Yes, I know I've never spoken to you about my family… but hey, you look like you needed the insight."

"Very profound," Cho said. "Ten year old advice."

Jane smiled and started strolling toward Lisbon's office. "I'm going to check on our fair commandant. She was a little sick this morning after she got here."

"Boss is sick?"

Van Pelt leaped to her feet. Jane nearly lost his balance as she shoved past him. She dashed into Lisbon's office and closed the door just as faint retching issued from within. Light flashed on the blinds as they slammed closed.

Rigsby looked guiltily toward the office before leaning on his desk and facing Cho and Jane. "Another reason I didn't get much sleep is that last night Sarah told me she's moving to Miami. She says she's taking Ben with her."

There was no reason for such awkwardness from the tall man. So what caused it?

"So you're moving too." Cho said. For once it wasn't in his usual flat, non-committal vocal delivery. The Asian man's voice actually broke a little.

"I won't lose my son," Rigsby snapped.

Jane smiled, proud of his coworkers. Cho noticed and frowned even more deeply.

"What's so funny?"

"Well..." Jane prevaricated, choosing his response carefully to avoid a punch in the nose. "Not funny, per se. I'm just… you know… amazed at the both of you." They continued to stare at him. He decided to risk the violence. "Take Rigsby, for example. I once was astounded by his bravery and willingness to chase down the bad guy while possessing absolute terror of personal commitment, no doubt caused by the deplorable behavior of his father towards him and his mother. Now he's moving across the country so he doesn't miss a single sleepless night spent in the pediatric emergency room.

"And you, Cho? You picked up on Wayne's dilemma even faster than I did."

"He's my partner."

Jane shrugged and searched the air for his next response. "Sure, you know him, but at the same your deductive reasoning skills are becoming honed to a fine edge. You're a regular katana –"

"That's Japanese," Cho said, back to his Dragnet flat voice. "I'm Korean. Not nearly the same."

"Fine. Let's say then that you're a graduate of the Sherlock Holmes detective school. Is that better?"

Both men stared like he'd finally exploded his last brain cell.

The office door opened and Van Pelt's head peeked out before disappearing again. Then, looking neither left nor right, both women marched out and straight to the restroom. The hardware screeched as they entered.

"They really need to oil that door," Jane said.

* * *

Cho and Rigsby settled into their chairs to begin the workday and debate their choices of cold case files while awaiting the call for the next case. Jane returned to his sofa and opened the communism book to page 75, paragraph 2, sentence 4, right where he left off. Taking a deep breath, he delved into plots of intrigue and battles of will, soon realizing that he doesn't much care who Stalin killed or has ordered killed. Mainly he puzzled over why the two most capable women he knows are still in the restroom, acting like high schoolers.

At page 121, paragraph 4, sentence 1, he closed the tome and looked at the hall, just as the women walked past again. Lisbon's face was red and puffy as she stared straight ahead. Van Pelt, on the other hand, doted. Sorrow and worry traded spaces in her expression, while her hand hovered over her boss's shoulder.

Uh oh. Something had changed about Lisbon's slow-budding, verge-of-blooming romance that had nothing to do with over-indulgence at the wine bar. Stoic Lisbon might keep it in, but Van Pelt wore so many hearts on her sleeve, she might as well have a patch made. Yes, maybe Lisbon was sick and Van Pelt was simply trying to convince her to go home, but if her boss was _only_ sick, how would the emotion of sorrow enter into it? Van Pelt had been crying too.

Perhaps Lisbon cared more for her paramour than he had understood but decided to end it prematurely. That certainly would upset Van Pelt. The little bit of information Grace had to share was distributed to the rest of the team with a glad smile and the trace of goose bumps on the young woman's arms. Van Pelt was a showcase of joyful tells when she wasn't being careful. Still there was little enough to share: Lisbon had found someone she was interested in, that they saw each other on the weekends, and that he was an older widower, no kids. Oh, and he was in law enforcement. But that was it. Van Pelt didn't even know the guy's name. Lisbon evidently hadn't committed _that_ far, to the point she was willing to share.

Jane decided to give Van Pelt a few minutes to clear out before accosting Lisbon himself. Then he noticed the stale taste in his mouth and the slight clinginess of his shirt. Maybe a shower was in order first.

* * *

In the CBI gym locker room, Jane stood in front of the mirror, towel wrapped around his waist, electric razor going back and forth over his face. He hit a couple spots several times before dropping the appliance away with disgust. One of these days it would give him a good shave. One of these days he'd remember to buy blades.

One of these days he'd get into the habit of cleaning up his act on a regular basis.

_Not likely._

Actually it might be forced upon him. The squad was breaking up, whether or not they realized it. Just like when the first sibling leaves the family unit, either to go off to school or get married or just stretching wings for greater independence. One small shift changed the entire family dynamic and soon each member would drift away. A completely natural progression. Oh, the unit would be strong in times of strife, coming together instantly when necessary, but day-to-day life would never be the same for any of them.

He smirked at his own reflection. His unruly blond-streaked hair was flat against his scalp, still wet from his shower. It reminded him of his highly groomed appearance on stage, back when being put together was half the job of a con man. Yes, he was still a con man, fooling everyone around him – the bad guys, the good guys, his coworkers – while still giving hope to the downtrodden. He'd have to find a way to keep doing that, since he couldn't imagine returning to his former trade as a charlatan. As hard as it was to admit, he'd grown.

The smirk paled into a frown. Maybe he had, but it wasn't enough for his best friend. _She_ was trying to fool _him_? Foolish of her. It wouldn't work, especially as big as this issue was. And as far as a change to the team, she was about to be assigned to desk duty. After all, that's what they always did with pregnant officers.

* * *

When Jane returned to the bullpen, the two male agents were gathered around Van Pelt's desk, debating something on her computer screen. The tension within all of them displayed the history; the boys had tried to get the scoop from the girl and the girl had refused, so now they were all going to pretend like work was all they had.

_Because she has nothing to tell. She knows about the baby but Lisbon wouldn't name the father. It was embarrassing enough that there _is_ a father._

Jane walked into Lisbon's office and closed the door. Lisbon ignored him. Glancing around, he noted that the blinds had been reopened, so he closed them again.

"Jane, I'd like the light in here. Could you put those back the way they were?"

He dragged a chair to her side of the desk and took her wrist. A deer in the headlights stared back at him

"So… you know about Rigsby?"

She blinked rapidly before shaking her head. He grinned.

_I still got it – the ability to surprise this person._

"What about him?"

"He's leaving the unit. Moving to Florida."

Considering her already riled emotions, he expected more surprise or even an angry outburst against Wayne and then men in general, along the lines of the typical state of the male ego and selfishness therein.

Instead Lisbon burst into inconsolable tears.

Swallowing hard, Jane pulled her chair from under the desk and drew her towards him. Her arms flew around his neck in a choke hold as she flooded his shoulder. He held her in return, drawing her shuddering frame to his chest in hopes that she could get some peace despite his clumsy efforts at comforting.

"Yes, Teresa, things are changing all over," he said softly. "Wayne is moving. Kimball is aching to lead a unit of his own so long as he feels you're all right with it. Grace is on the verge of finding her true purpose. Looks like you need to change too. It will be okay so long as you accept the coming changes that are inevitable."

In the midst of her heart-breaking sobs, she tried to form words. Hard, district 'ch' sounds rose above it.

"Yes, 'change', Teresa," he said, pulling her upright and staring into her flooding eyes. "Deep breaths, my dear. Look at me and take deep breaths."

She had pluck, that was certain. But he knew that already, didn't he?

"I just have one question, Teresa. You don't have to answer right away if you don't want to but I need an answer within the next couple weeks."

Hard gulps and heavy sniffling preceded a brisk nod. Her beautiful green eyes were reddened by tears, making them seem to glow like emeralds and rubies. He placed a tender kiss on her lips.

"Teresa, I have to ask you…what do you want to name our baby?"


End file.
